Flipp Reply

Reply to “Flipp”
December 6, 1889
pg. 3

I have been watching “Flipp’s” articles ever since he began to write, and it is hard for me to tell whether he is a gentleman or a g–d f–l. But the Bible tells me, “Judge not, least ye be judged,” and so I reckon I had better stop before I get judged; because they might judge me a little too severly, and that would hurt my feelings. Mr. ‘Flipp’ gives a very vivid description of the trip to Windsor, but just let me tell you something. I expect that Mr. “Flipp” was one of the party, and that is why “that wife of his” gets the best of him so many times, is because he gets into so much trouble. In one of the back issues of the Beacon Mr. “Flipp” gets rather poetical I think, and that leads me to believe that he is not married at all. Look out girls for him. When you see a man wearing a beaver hat, a cuff for a dollar and a pair of pants three sizes too small for him and a single eye glass – that is him. But you must remember that this is not leap year, and so not make a mistake and pop the question to him.

I have been studying right much lately, and the consequence is that my head has grown, and forced me to buy a new hat. Everything that we do creates wear and tear, and sometimes I think that if we did not have to eat and wear this world would be a paradise.

Mr. “Flipp” says in the last Beacon that he is going to Washington, and will write up the trip. I doubt very much that he has ever been to Washington, and as to writing up the trip I know he is lost.

Last week I was taking a little trip on the Str. Bertie, in company with some ladies of Bertie county. One of them playfully gave the swinging lamp a turn, when lamp, fixtures and everything came down to the floor. The scene was appalling. I was down on the first deck, and heard such a stamped and cries of fire that I rushed up, to find the whole room in a blaze. I felt like I was about to make the Roanoke my resting place, and so I lept to the stern of the noble steamer and made a cross on my forehead and knelt in prayer. I prayed until I went asleep. I had not been asleep long when some one tapped me on the should and said: “Fare, please.” It was the captain, and I asked him if the boat had been turned up. He replied, “Oh no, I haven’t seen any fire worth mentioning.” I paid my fare and got off at the first landing; but not before I tried to convince the captain that I was a man of learning. — “Flipp’s” Tormentor.

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